He chose to be cremated. I have had a very hard time with this issue. I didn't want to allow it, even knowing it was what he wanted. Its just so final. He is completely and utterly gone. I know it would have been no different otherwise, he would have been buried, but this is so much harder to think about.
Each of his children are getting a small measure of his ashes.
I went today to pick them up, to give to my siblings.
I was standing outside the funeral home, looking up at the sky, trying to find the courage to go in. My heart was so very heavy. As I climbed the stairs, I asked my dad to send me a sign that he was with me at that very hard moment.
Out of nowhere, a very small white feather fluttered down around my shoulders and landed on the ground in front of me.
I know that was him.
I know it was him, and I am so very thankful to know that he can hear me.
He's still with me.
~sugar
