Grandma got her ass spanked by a reindeer
Walking home from my house Christmas Eve
She tried to tell me Santa is a hoax
But He gave her a reason to believe!
This one is set to "I'll be Home for Christmas".
I'll be sore for Christmas
He has told me so
We'll have "ooooooo"
And "No, no, no!!!
And then its cornertime.
My ass will be smarting
A sorry girl I'll be
I'll be sore for Christmas
Its coal and canes for me!
This one is set to "Hark the Herald Angels Sing"
Hark, the Head of Household says
"Get your ass up on that bed!"
Peace is gone, no mercy nigh
Just His hand, raised to the sky.
Squirmy on the bed she waits
For the brush she loves to hate
Hears a "crack" and hollers "ow!"
All thoughts of bratting banished now!
Hark the Head of Household says
"She'll be a good girl now, I bet!"
This one is set to just the verse part of "Jingle Bells".
Dashing throught the house,
Away from Him I'll run
Until He's out of breath
And I have Him undone!
When He catches me
A spanking I will get
And then I'll be a happy girl
Its our best Christmas yet!!
And finally, this last one really made Ace laugh. Its set to "The Little Drummer Boy".
Come He told me.
(Oh crap thats not good!)
Our implements to see.
(Oh sh*t thats not good!!)
You need a spanking dear
(Oh no, thats ok!)
So get your ass over here!
(Wait, what did He say?!?)
(Oh hell no, no way!!!)
(Just GO AWAY!!!!!)
"Now you're TOAST dear" thats what He said
(Sh*t, I'm dead, dead,DEAD, DEAD!!)
Happy Holidays! Enjoy! :)
