A Trip to the Mall

Last weekend, we decided to take our little one to see the 3D edition of Beauty in the Beast, a plan which required us to drive an hour to the city closest to us with a movie theater high tech enough to show such movies (in this case in a shopping mall). The movie was really good, littles really enjoyed it and its fun to see classics like that come back so she can experience them that way.

After the movie, we decided to walk around the mall as we needed to get His mom a birthday present. I tell you what, when you havent been out and about a whole lot (like me), its amazing the things you find. Ace and I kept ourselves laughing at all of the seemingly harmless, vanilla things that can be kinkified or spankified. Spatulas (the Star Wars ones are really cool), pizza peels, bath and hairbrushes, decorative bamboo sticks (seriously, I couldnt see much other purpose for those, they are meant to be spankified!) and all of those things were in just one of the stores we visited! :) At one point, Ace shocked the heck out of me by mentioned getting one of the items for his mom for her birthday, stating with conviction "SHE NEEDS IT". I wasnt even drinking anything and I choked!

Me: Wait........what?!?!?!?
Him: Well what? Tell me she doesnt need it!
Me: Well, I cant say I disagree, but I never ever would have guessed you would say that about your MOM!
Him: She's stressed out, driving herself and everybody else crazy. Maybe that would settle her down a bit.
Me: OMG, I can just see your dad throwing her over his knee! (collapsing into giggles at the thought)
Him: I wish he would one of these days. Maybe if we gave something like this (spatula) to him for his birthday.
Me: He would never get the idea to use it that way.
Him: Unless we made sure there was no way to miss it. We could always do a demo for him (giving me a rather loud smack for in the middle of a store)

I shot him a slightly annoyed look then took the spatula from Him and put it back (unfortunately). At one point we walked past the men's department and he steered us towards the belts along a wall (insert shiver here). He took one down and stated that it was exactly what His dad needed for His mom. Oy! I have had the opportunity to meet and become somewhat well-acquainted with a belt just like the one He was holding, and while I actually rather enjoy belts overall, they can be harsh implements, particularly for starting off with, so I didnt agree with him on that one. Do I think a spanking would do my mother in law good? Heck yes! Do I think she should be whipped with a belt? Absolutely not, she would never be able to handle that. Anything more than a hand would probably break her apart. We dont exactly see eye to eye, but just like anyone else I know who regularly practices this lifestyle, I would never want her to experience anything that would cause lasting damage, physically or in this case emotionally. Regardless of how I feel about her or she feels about me, I would never wish harm on her that way. (but a small wake up call wouldnt hurt!)

Anyhow, our littles had been being very well behaved while we shopped, so we took her to the other end of the mall where there is a carousel and let her ride it. While we were spinning around, getting rather sick, I noticed a sign up another wing of the mall a bit. I couldnt read much of it from where we were, but I could clearly make out at least one word on it (tops). I began to laugh and told Ace to look for it the next time we went around to that side. He saw it as well, began to laugh, and after the carousel ride we walked over to take a look at it. Seeing the whole sign, we both were laughing and Ace took out His phone to get a picture:

TOPS Club Inc.! OMG! I could not stop laughing at this. It was actually a sign for some weight loss group, but the idea of Tops forming their own little secret club and then advertising for members was too funny! I can just see the handbook rules for admission:

TO JOIN OUR MOST SECRET CLUB YOU MUST BE THE FOLLOWING:

1. Humorless---Tops must have no sense of humor, or must carefully mask their sense of humor under a strick cloud of disappointment and boredom. Under no circumstance should a bottom ever cause a top to laugh---to do so would be considered no less than treason.

2. Deaf----A bottom will attempt any and all means of pleading and wheedling to avoid just punishment. A top must be able to turn a deaf ear to such nonsense and spank without mercy anyway.

3. Logical----A top must always possess good logic skills. Reasons must be given for imposing a punishment on a bottom. These reasons need not make sense or may be completely made up at a top's discretion. If a no other reason can be thought of, "because I said so" will do.

4. Blameless----Nothing is ever the top's fault. If there is fault, it is clearly on the part of the bottom and should be punished accordingly.

WELCOME TO THE DARK SIDE SECRET CLUB---HENCE FORTH YOU SHALL BE CALLED DARTH TOPNER.

:) *Just kidding----well mostly! :)    

~sugar (and Ace)